There's a 12 Step saying for that - Don't Judge Your Inside By Someone Else's Outside. That is, don't think someone is happier than you because their kids are better behaved, their house is bigger, or his/her spouse gives really nice anniversary presents. Boy, could you be really wrong. There are lots of almost broke folks in those big houses. There are lots of parents whose kids appear well behaved til their parents' backs are turned. And, there are millions of men and women whose spouse gave them a really nice gift the day before they filed for divorce. Really! I can name names.
Then, there are people who say mean things about other people. Who knows why? Sometimes, it is to make them feel better about themselves. Not my style. But, as a child I was called a number of names - Fatty, Blubber Butt, Four Eyes (yep, I had glasses younger than anyone else I knew), and worse. We all know that terrible words are hurled around on school playgrounds and now on the internet. It's called Bullying.
If we're lucky, we reach a time and place where we are not limited by the definitions of others. We learn to love ourselves even if we aren't thin, lovely, wealthy, or perfect in any other way. But, sometimes, it's really difficult to overcome those words that are not supposed to break our bones. They can break our hearts instead.
If you've been called Fat or Lazy or Stupid or Ugly or Worthless or _________(enter your own negative word - then never say it again), you alone have the power to decide if that word defines you. It really does not matter what others think of you (and, oh, how I wish they'd keep their opinions to themselves!). It's far more important what you think of yourself. If you think the word Fat defines you, will you be able to move beyond that to become a worthy, loveable, capable, healthy person? If you've been told and come to believe that you are Lazy, will you be able to get off the sofa and walk your way to health?
You can! I loved the story I read in the October 4, 2012 issue of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch about Harry Ratliff who, in his 50's, decided that he would no longer be defined by the term Fatty Jelly Belly. He was tired of being short of breath on the handball court. He was tired of having high blood pressure and high cholesterol. He was tired of being tired and afraid to die young like his father had.
So, he decided to get healthy. He decided to get moving. His preferred method of moving was jogging. He said that the first time he ran a mile without stopping, '...it was a religious experience.' I know that feeling! Do you? Do you know what it feels like to work hard to attain a goal over weeks and months and get there - even when someone else voiced an opinion that you couldn't do it?
I hope you can find a copy of this story and read it. It's inspirational. While Ratliff uses techniques that are different than I would (running vs. walking, for instance), his initial goal was to feel better and to become healthier. In so doing, he lost 62 pounds. That's my story too. When you really push for a goal to become healthier and feel better, the weight comes off in the process. While most people might not have 62 pounds to lose (I did!), weight loss does accompany a healthy regimen of physical movement.
This blog isn't about bullying or weight loss. It isn't about negativity or feeling sorry for one's self. It is about taking steps to make one feel better. There's no way around it. If you take someone else's estimation of you and that's a negative estimation, you'll lose out. If you choose your own nouns and adjectives for yourself, you'll move in a positive direction.
I am healthy. I am worthy. I am happy. I am always looking for ways to be happier and healthier. What about you?
Note: Here's a link to the story. Don't know how long it will be available.
Remember my 100% GUARANTEE. Should you decide to stop walking and resume your old habits, I personally guarantee that you'll get back 100% of your former life - your pain, your lifestyle, your attitude. You can trust the information you find here. It's from a dedicated walker. Trust me and your life will get better! I promise.
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